So here it is, the day has arrived when my “project” is set to begin. I did not have a countdown going, as the inspiration for me to walk this path arrived rather recently. Almost a week ago, to the day, when I did not see it coming, it was clear to me, that I felt and feel a great desire to not only sit with my Self, but also return to the gift held in written expression and sharing via this blog. So if you are reading this, thank you – for taking the time, to connect with my journey and your own, to Be.
So what brings me here, seated in the office my husband and I share, surrounded by photos of loved ones, typing away, while listening to the handpan played? (you can listen too if interested, it is wonderfully soothing: Hang Drum Meditation Music)
There is no short answer. As with every journey though, if we take the time to reflect on it all, there is usually a moment from which the ripples of change begin to change the waters, as we know them. I recently experienced a major life event that broke me open in deepest sorrow and great hope for new beginnings and all that lies ahead. (I will share more about this soon). For now, there is that pivotal moment during the restorative yoga class and sound bath that I co-lead with a friend and local sound healer, that made it undeniably clear to me, what rock I wish to throw into the waters, effecting ripples of change outward. It is the practice of meditation: daily, mindful, connected, seated and throughout my day. This is the rock I chose to throw into the already flowing waters of my life’s energy.
As I was leading the class just over a week ago, I guided the students to, with their eyes closed, envision themselves, seated next to a river. With their attention on the breath flowing through them and around them, I asked them to feel the waves of energy moving through their Being and out into the world, as carried through the breath. As I spoke these words, the sounds of the gong filled the studio. Ripples of energy rolled through the room, carried in the sound waves and into the body through the breath. As the instructor of the yoga class, I am holding space, sharing space, guiding a journey that is both personal and shared. I felt my Being calling out for space to held for it, without judgement, with honest awareness. So, I listened. I led the students and myself from movement to seated stillness and as I did this, I assumed in all honesty that the one playing the gong would continue to, allowing for the sound to land on us, effecting change in and around. Instead though, to my overwhelmed emotion, the one I co-lead this journey with, chose to silence the gong. This was confronting to say the very least. For here I am – leading the journey and realizing that I too so desire to journey as a student in this way. To sit, to feel, to cry, to laugh, to express fully, and to Be Present with all I am, all that is… so here I go. Day 1.
Life is a mystery – mystery of beauty, bliss and divinity. Meditation is the art of unfolding that mystery. – Amit Ray